Two Steps Back Read online

  Johnny’s father sucked his teeth at the news of his impending grandchild. “I see this girl did not waste any time trapping you,” he said, causing a new pang of anger to ricochet through Jaylah’s limbs. She leapt up from the bed and mouthed the words “trapped you?” to Johnny, pissed off that the decision she agonized over had been reduced to a cheap trick by a conniving woman. “Offer her some money, son, and I’m sure she will go away. Then you can get back to your life.”

  Johnny blew out a rush of air, then reached out for Jaylah’s hand. “Papa, she didn’t trap me, and she’s not going anywhere. We’re getting married. I hope you and mum can support me on this.”

  “Support you?” Johnny’s father laughed harshly. “I’m supposed to support my son’s stupidity? I wouldn’t dream of it. If you insist on ruining your life, I won’t be apart of it.”

  Johnny looked at his phone in disbelief. “What are you saying?”

  “Call me when you’ve come to your senses and are back home with your wife!” his father snapped before hanging up the phone, ruining their chance of a happy afternoon.

  Jaylah searched her heart for the words that would soothe Johnny’s wounds, but she doubted whatever she said could assuage the pain he felt from his father’s rebuke. It was one thing for Johnny’s father to blame her for ruining his son’s life, but it was quite another to disown his only son because he disagreed with Johnny’s choice.

  The stakes had just been raised, and Jaylah knew that being kicked out of the Poku clan would either force them to grow closer together or pull them apart. At the moment, though, it was impossible to predict which would occur.

  Jaylah walked up behind Johnny and put her hands around his waist. She rested her head on his back and inhaled his musky cologne. He leaned into her embrace, and for a moment, Jaylah felt like she was holding him up.

  “I’m proud of you,” she said after a few minutes. “And I love you.”

  Johnny turned to face her and kissed Jaylah on the lips. “Good. Because you and the baby are all I’ve got.”

  She probed his face for signs that he was joking, but found none. Johnny was right; she was it.

  “But is that enough?”

  Johnny tried to smile, but the feeling never reached his eyes. Jaylah wanted to cheer him up, but words continued to fail her. She felt like all the king’s horses and all the king’s men, hoping to piece her lover back together. Jaylah wanted him to be the sanguine man she’d fallen hard for and had given herself to without even thinking twice, but she just couldn’t figure out what to say.

  Jaylah found his lips again, drawing him into her and kissing him with a passion that startled them both. She grabbed his t-shirt and pulled it quickly over his head before running her tongue over his nipples.

  He started to speak, “Jaylah…I’m not in the—” but she ignored his protest and continued nibbling her way down his chest to his stomach. She paused at his belly button and traced it with her tongue, then unbuckled his pants and slipped her hand in his boxers. She felt him swell at her touch and Johnny let out a sharp grunt when she began massaging him.

  Jaylah may not have known what to say to coax Johnny back to himself, but she could show him that he wasn’t stupid or worthless or foolish. She could remind him that she not only wanted him, but also needed him more than anyone else in the world.

  Jaylah followed the tuffs of hair that ran from Johnny’s stomach to the space between his thighs, smothering him in warm kisses before taking his shaft between her lips. She sucked him slowly, carefully, a thank you for he fighting for their love.

  It was clear Johnny was his father’s son—stubborn, resolute, not easily crushed—and longed for his approval. So the fact that he had not only gone to battle for her, but was willing to walk away from his family, confirmed what they had was stronger than either of them had ever imagined.

  Johnny grabbed Jaylah’s hair and thrust himself deeper into her mouth. She held onto his hips and listened as his sounds grew louder and less controlled. She wanted him to move insider her, closing the gap between them and once again fusing them into one body.

  Jaylah pushed Johnny onto the bed and climbed on top of him, sliding down into his lap. They rocked together, matching each other’s rhythm and refusing to rush to the end, even though they were both close to their peak. Johnny covered her mouth with his and allowed his tongue to play between her lips while his hips pushed deeper into her. Each time she drew him in, her muscles clinching, Johnny exhaled her name, nudging Jaylah closer and closer to surrendering to the force building in her loins.

  “Don’t leave me, Jaylah. Don’t ever leave me,” he said over and over again as he swam inside her dampness.

  Jaylah vibrated as pressure rippled through her middle and out to her limbs. Johnny rolled her over, claiming the top spot so he could look in her eyes when she came. He stroked her harder, deeper, grunting promises to protect and love her forever.

  “Please, please, please,” he begged as he exploded inside her, “don’t ever leave me, baby.”

  Johnny collapsed and rested his head in the crook of her neck while he caught his breath. Jaylah rubbed his back, trying to stop her heart from cracking open at the urgency in his words. Johnny had never had a problem expressing his love for her, but the pleading stunned her.

  “Yes,” Johnny said when he was able to speak.

  “Yes, what?” Jaylah had no clue what Johnny was talking about, but would’ve granted him anything in that moment.

  “You and the baby are enough. More than enough.”

  Jaylah’s heart danced. It was official, they were a family. No matter who doubted it, they were a little three-person unit that she had stumbled on by accident, but would do anything to protect.

  And at that moment Jaylah pitied anyone who dared get in their way.

  Fourteen

  “I was thinking,” Jaylah said, watching Johnny get dressed for dinner. “Maybe I should change the date of my return ticket to London.”

  Johnny popped his head in the room, looking concerned. “You don’t want to stay longer, do you? I don’t think I could bear more than a few weeks of this.”

  “No, I mean, maybe I should just go…”

  “Home?” he asked, finishing her sentence.

  “Yeah. Since I’m not shipping my things and I’ve already cleaned out my old apartment, there’s nothing left for me to do here. I don’t really have a reason to stay.”

  He put on his tie. “What about your parents?”

  “I think I’ve seen enough of them for a while,” Jaylah snickered. “Besides, I need to get back to work before Hillary changes her mind about me. Then my ass will be deported. I don’t want to press my luck, especially since I’ll have to take a little time off for the baby.”

  “A little time off? You mean a few months, yeah?”

  “No, I don’t think I’ll need that long. As long as everything goes well, I can go back to work a few weeks after having it.”

  Johnny looked at her for a moment, opened his mouth to speak, and then shook his head.

  “What?”

  “Nothing.” Johnny looked himself over in the mirror before putting on his jacket.

  “Mr. Poku, I know when you have something to say. Out with it.”

  He hesitated. “It’s just….I don’t think you should be in such a rush to get back to work after the baby is born.”

  She rolled her eyes. This conversation. Again.

  “I’m not going to give up my job, Johnny. You know I’m not the stay at home type. I love writing, and if you want me to quit, then we’re going to have a huge problem.”

  He crossed the room and stood in front of her. “I’m not suggesting you give up writing.”

  “So what are you saying then?” she asked, hands on her hips.

  Johnny put his arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him. “Just keep an open mind. Things might change. You may need, or want, to take time off. And that’s okay. You don’t have to try to
be superwoman. You’re not in this alone, Jaylah. Remember that.”

  “No, you remember that when the baby is screaming its head off at three in the morning and I don’t feel like getting up.”

  Johnny grinned. “I’ll try.”

  He leaned down and kissed her, his hands tracing her breasts through the fabric of her dress.

  “Don’t get fresh, Mr. Poku.” Jaylah moved them back to her waist. “My parents are expecting us.”

  “We can be a few minutes late, innit.”

  “Not if you want my mother to like you,” she said, straightening his tie.

  “Well, we can’t have both sets of parents hating me, can we?” he said, trying to make a joke but Jaylah could tell the wound from his father’s admonishment was still tender.

  “I’m sorry, for—“

  “It’s not your fault,” he said, cutting her off. “My father is a very obstinate man, especially when he thinks you’ve made a bad choice.”

  Even though Johnny had stuck up for her, his words still stung. A bad choice. Did Johnny make a bad choice when he fell in love with Jaylah? Despite what he said, would he come to view her as a grand mistake that had started his life downhill?

  Jaylah’s mind began to spin, causing her to stumble away from Johnny. He caught her hand and brought her back to his chest.

  “But I have no doubt,” he said, looking directly in her eyes. “You’re the best choice I’ve made in years, Jaylah. Years.”

  Johnny opened the door, then stepped aside to let her pass through. “I mean, just look at that ass.” He pinched her butt as she walked through the door. “That alone is worth it.”

  As they set out to meet her parents, Jaylah prayed he was right. Everything they’d been through, and had still yet to experience, would hopefully be worth it.

  * * *

  “Mom, dad, this is Jonathan Poku,” Jaylah said, finally introducing her parents to the man she loved. “Johnny, these are my parents, Sarah and Joe Baldwin.”

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Baldwin,” Johnny said, leaning in to greet them.

  “Please, call me Joe,” Mr. Baldwin said, clapping Johnny on the back as the men shook hands.

  Jaylah kept her gaze on her mother and tried to read her thoughts, but in these situations—welcoming someone to her home—Mrs. Baldwin rarely let her true feelings escape. Ever the perfect hostess, Mrs. Baldwin kept her smile light and her tone charming.

  “Johnny, we’re happy to have you. We’ve heard so much about you.” She looked at her daughter and winked. “Can I take your jacket and get you a drink? We’ve got water, pop, wine…”

  “...And beer,” Mr. Baldwin broke in before asking his wife, “Honey, can you grab me one?” He motioned toward Johnny, “What do you say, Jonathan? Want to share a cold one while the ladies gossip about us?”

  Johnny laughed politely. “Sure, Sir, that would be fine.”

  “Joe,” Mr. Baldwin corrected, “call me Joe, son.”

  “Okay, as long as you call me Johnny.”

  “You got it!”

  Mr. Baldwin sat off toward the den, and Johnny quickly kissed Jaylah on the side of her head before following after him. When the men were out of earshot, Mrs. Baldwin spoke up.

  “Well...” she gushed, “isn’t he just gorgeous.” Jaylah grinned; her mother was never shy about noticing, and commenting on, handsome men. Whenever they’d go to brunch Mrs. Baldwin would always point out good-looking waiters or diners. “You’re married!” Jaylah would tell her mother, playfully rolling her eyes. “Yes, and I haven’t gone blind yet,” Mrs. Baldwin would always answer.

  “Help me with the drinks Jay Jay.”

  Jaylah trailed behind her mother, catching a glimpse of her father and Johnny. They seemed to be getting on well, both men smiling and animated as they talked.

  When they got into the expansive kitchen Jaylah grabbed two beers from the fridge and popped them open, then pulled out a bottle of San Pellegrino for herself and her mother.

  “Want me to take these out now?”

  “No, we’ll let them talk for a bit. You know how your father is; he’s probably already going on about the Lakers or something. Besides, it’ll give us a little time to catch up,” Mrs. Baldwin said, no doubt relishing the idea of a chinwag with her daughter.

  Jaylah knew “catch up” actually meant interrogate and her stomach immediately flip-flopped. She wanted to grab the bottle of merlot that was resting in the wine cooler and pour herself a large glass, but she resisted. Jaylah didn’t need both Johnny and her mother getting on her case for having a glass of vino tonight. Instead, she cracked open the San Pellegrino and squeezed a generous amount of lime juice into the sparkling water, and took a sip to calm her nerves.

  “Johnny has on a lovely suit tonight. What is that? Ralph Lauren?” she asked, placing the hors d'oeuvres on a sterling silver tray.

  “Zegna, I think. He got it yesterday.”

  “Yesterday? That must’ve cost him a pretty penny.”

  “Yeah, nearly $2500,” she said; her mother’s eyes widened. “I know.”

  “Hmph,” Mrs. Baldwin hummed. “So he does well for himself?”

  “Let’s put it this way, he’s not worried about paying the rent,” Jaylah chuckled. “He does okay, I guess.”

  “You’re not sure? You have to be sure, Jay Jay. You’re having a baby with this man.”

  Jaylah resisted the impulse to roll her eyes. She knew her mother only wanted the best for her, but lately, every time they spoke she felt like Mrs. Baldwin had forgotten she was actually an adult who no longer needed her lectures.

  “I’m pretty sure, mother. He drives a Benz, owns a townhouse, and works in finance. He’s certainly better off than I am.”

  “Cars and houses don’t mean a thing, Jay Jay.” Mrs. Baldwin shook her head like her daughter had completely missed the point. “You need to know he can take care of you. Now grab those drinks.”

  Jaylah and her mother filed out of the kitchen looking like two distant branches of a family tree. Mrs. Baldwin: slim, petite, and the color of cafe au lait. Jaylah: tall, voluptuous, and skin the hue of red clay after it rains. The only thing they seemed to have in common was their hair—thick, curly, and downright unruly at times. Mrs. Baldwin trimmed hers into a neat afro, while Jaylah let her tresses run wild atop her head. The mismatched pair interrupted the men just as they were debating which was the more difficult sport, soccer or basketball.

  “Johnny, I hope you brought your appetite,” Mrs. Baldwin said, placing a tray of salmon croquettes between the men. “You do eat fish, right dear?”

  “I eat anything, ma’am,” Johnny said, giving Mrs. Baldwin an easy smile.

  “Great! Dinner will be ready shortly, but these should tide you over.” She motioned toward Jaylah who handed each man a beer. “Need anything else fellas?”

  Mr. Baldwin shook his head as he stuffed a croquette in his mouth. “No, ma’am, I’m fine, thank you,” Johnny spoke up for the both of them.

  “Wonderful!” She clapped her hands and Jaylah marveled at her mother’s hosting skills. “Jay Jay, will you help me in the kitchen?”

  Jaylah gave Johnny a look that seemed to say, help, and he reached out and quickly squeezed her hand. He knew she was dreading the evening, and Jaylah interpreted his tiny gesture as confirmation that everything might just be okay.

  She returned to the kitchen to help her mother, but soon realized that Mrs. Baldwin, as usual, had everything under control.

  “Like I was saying,” her mother said, picking up their conversation right where they left off, “you need to be certain Johnny can take care of you and the baby, Jay Jay. Otherwise, the prudent thing to do is stay right here where your father and I can help out.”

  “I can take care of myself, mother. I have a job, you know.”

  “I know, sweetie, and I’m proud of you. I certainly wouldn’t have had the gumption to pick up and move to another country. A shopping trip? Yes. But move
?” Mrs. Baldwin kissed her teeth, and Jaylah was surprised her mother was actually proud she had taken a risk. Usually Mrs. Baldwin’s praise was reserved for achievements—doing well in school, writing a cover story for the paper. Jaylah’s mother rarely gave her props for doing something courageous, especially when she didn’t agree with the decision.

  Mrs. Baldwin walked around the granite island and stared up into her daughter’s face.

  “Jay Jay, I know you can take care of yourself, but you’re bringing a new life into the world. You need to be certain you can count on this man and he can take care of you if, God forbid, something goes wrong,” she patted her daughter’s hand. “How do you know he’s not just showing off? Johnny could be in financial trouble or mired in debt and you could end up supporting him.” Mrs. Baldwin made a face like she smelled something sour. “Can you imagine?”

  Supporting him? The mere thought of it sounded utterly ridiculous. Johnny would certainly not let that happen, he was too proud. The need to defend her man arose in Jaylah. Even if they lost it all, they could still make it, she figured. Money wasn’t everything; her parents had proved that.

  “Firstly, Johnny would never let me support him. Ever,” Jaylah told her mother. “And anyway, you and daddy didn’t have a lot of money when you first got married. Now look at you. Things worked out.”

  “Your father and I have known each other forever. We grew up together, remember? I know Joe better than he knows himself. Can you say the same for Johnny?”

  The question caught Jaylah off guard. Going in to dinner she predicted her traditional, Southern mother would all but push her into a quickie marriage with the father of her unborn child. After all, isn’t that what her parents had done? But here Mrs. Baldwin was trying to make sure Johnny was worthy of her. The conversation was both perplexing and a pleasant surprise.

  Jaylah was sure she loved Johnny, she was sure she was having their child, but beyond that? She couldn’t say.

  Jaylah had to admit her mother was right. They didn’t know each other well enough to even consider forever just yet, not with so much unfinished business left to tie up.